Forget thanks Obama we should be saying thanks Kim. It’s because of Kim Kardashian‘s stupid popularity that some of the dumbest atrocities have been birthed like all their reality shows and the cancelled Kris Jenner show. It looks like the popularity of media containing the name Kim Kardashian has struck a cord with Glu Mobile, because it was announced that they will be creating a mobile game with Jason Statham and Nicki Minaj. I was just as puzzeled as you are right now when I read the following quote given by the Chairman of Glu Niccolo de Masi

I am thrilled to welcome the undisputed queen of hip-hop, Nicki Minaj, to Glu’s growing list of celebrity partners. Nicki brings to Glu her audience of over 100 million social followers and a new music category. We look forward to combining Nicki’s distinctive style and massive global appeal with Glu’s celebrity social gaming expertise.

This quote doesn’t mention Jason Statham, but believe me they are making a game that features him. Apparently the game will be a first person shooter called Sniper X: Kill Confirmed and will be released at the end of this year. Holy crap, how generic is that title? Are they hoping for some of the key words to pop out like kill confirmed, which is a multiplayer mode in Call of Duty, and Sniper Elite is a game out currently for home consoles. The X is there just to be cool, because the lead character is probably a mysterious person.

The Nicki Minaj game details haven’t been given, but I’m going to go out on a limb and say that it’s about a person growing up to be a famous musician.

Both Jason and Nicki will be lending their voice and likeness, which means that they’ll record all the lines in one day at their house and send pictures to Glu to have the animators create a character. You know, what am I thinking, of course they’re going to be there giving input and games ideas. I remember seeing them each E3 playing all the newest games and giving interviews about what they’re currently playing. I’m sure this isn’t just a paycheck to them, it’s about the art. All the money they’re going to get from the obvious freemium type games these will be will probably get sent to charity.

Honestly who the hell drew these names out of a hat and who is the other person who greenlit these ideas. If Jason’s game is a first person shooter, you’ll never see the characters face. The only likeness of him you’ll see is probably on the thumbnail of the game. As far as Nicki goes, this game is going to print money because all the same people who pay for items in the Kim Kardashian game will migrate to Nicki’s game because it’s new and hip.

I’m not mad at Jason Statham or Nicki Minaj, I hope they make tons of money and Kim’s game goes under, I’m just mad at the potential of what will happen next. Maybe we’ll see a Kendall and Kylie game or a momager game featuring Kris, in any case things will be bad…thank kim!

By Taylor

Taylor is one half of Media Discord and resides in Orange County, CA. He grew up loving video games, comics and movies. His favorite game is Chrono Trigger and his favorite comic book character is Deadpool.

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